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50% lame And 50% annoying

Previously too-rad-to-function

Follow my insta @ mauraizzy


life hack: make out with me


Reblog8 hours ago with 185,816 notes

“mmmmm so what am i gonna delete next”

me after deleting half of my apps to update to ios 8 (via sniffing)

Reblog1 day ago with 1,173 notes

Thanks for the follow back! :)


For sure!

Reblog5 days ago with 0 notes



There’s two types of anger one is dry and the other wet and basically wet anger is when your eyes water and your voice shakes and I hate that cause I feel weak when I’m crying while angry I like dry anger when your face is like stone and your voice is sharp I guess wet anger shows that you care too much and dry anger means you’re done.

This is the best description ever

Reblog1 week ago with 320,844 notes

reblog if your name isn’t Ashley.

Reblog2 weeks ago with 4,546,498 notes


excuse me mom but whoever smelt it dealt it so it is in fact YOU who’s doing the weed

Reblog2 weeks ago with 378,295 notes

1) I wish my parents would have told me that things can change so abruptly and sometimes so painfully and that all you can really do is just sit and stare blankly back at it. They never warned me about losing someone you loved and simply all the closure you can seem to get is a “I don’t love you anymore, I’m sorry.” and half of a wave goodbye.

2) I wish my parents would have told me that sometimes there is no fixing a person. That sometimes, a person simply is not broken. You can’t fix something that isn’t broken. Sometimes you are the person that is broken and needs the fixing. But humans are not medicine. They aren’t going to mend your broken bones or soothe the pain in your chest.

3) I wish my parents would of told me that just because you have an idea of a person, it doesn’t always prove to be the reality of that person. Sometimes the best liar can be your mind, intoxicated by attraction.

4) I wish my parents would have told me that not everything is as simple as we believe it to be. That sometimes, you have to continue to work and work at something, only to be shot back down again. Getting back up time after time can be difficult, but it wouldn’t hurt so god damn much mom and dad, if you would have informed me of its existence in the universe and the large roll it plays in our lives.

5) I wish my parents would have told me that among all of the drugs they tried so desperately to inform me of, the strongest known to mankind was love and the second, lust. More importantly, I wish they would have explained to me the difference between the two.

6) Finally, I wish that my parents would have told me that there is no avoiding getting hurt in this world. That I myself alone, am the hero of the story and I do not need to be saved.

6 Things I Wish My Parents Would Have Told Me (via sassellocinsass)

Reblog3 weeks ago with 548 notes

Pet Peeves #1



Aries: beating around the bush
Taurus: constant noises
Gemini: having to explain themselves twice
Cancer: twisted words
Leo: too much talk not enough action
Virgo: being pressured
Libra: people who hold grudges for too long
Scorpio: being lied to
Sagittarius: dwelling on the past
Capricorn: knowing they can do better 
Aquarius: taking orders
Pisces: not being heard

Reblog3 weeks ago with 6,693 notes

This is it. That panda is me.


im so worried about tall boys….be safe…be careful up there… maybe u should come down here and kiss me

Reblog3 weeks ago with 411,880 notes


it must be really wild to actually have a positive relationship with your father



some people really have that????

that’s insane

Reblog1 month ago with 77,465 notes




*mr krabs voice* secret formuler 

*plankton voice* hand it over krabs

*mr krabs voice* eat a dick plankton 

Reblog1 month ago with 262,702 notes



Randomly remembering a joke and laughing about it to yourself

This fucking duck. Gets me every time.